Single and Sane

I am sooooo over JDate. When you find yourself on a date with a man who more than vaguely resembles your sister's father-in-law (FIL), it is time to call it quits. It's not just him, I've had numerous (numerous!) bad dates. There's been Not-so-Secretly-Gay Date, Crazy Cop date in which he was obsessed with getting me into his car, Tiny Hands-Big Ring date (THBR), and Perfect-but-Orthodox (PO) date. And so many others, but NO MORE. From now on I'm going to meet boys the good old fashioned way, trolling outside of Columbia's business and law schools. If that doesn't work I'm going down to the med school and purposely breaking my ankle so that some sweet man has to save me. At this time, I would like to share a few excerpts from my more notable dates:

THBR: (after 30 minutes of insurance talk)... and that's why selling insurance is really all about building relationships. If when you call the client you can say, "Hi, how's your wife and kids, how's your pet Fido" then they know you care.
Me: Hmmmm, so true
THBR: And so you do Peace Ed, where would you teach that?
Me: You know, it's interesting, because I'm finding through my program that you can teach it anywhere. I'm interested in Israel, but I have classmates who are looking at inner city violence-
THBR: Actually, I don't know much about this, so I really can't comment. So we probably shouldn't discuss it.
Me: (silence, conversation absolutely dead)

PO: Both of my older siblings are married and have kids
Me: That's so sweet, how many kids do they have?
PO: one has 5, the other has 4
Me: Wow, how old is the oldest?
PO: 6
Me: (shocked silence, calculating how many children I'll have to have with him if I go on a second date)

Me: So you spent three years in Africa doing Peace Corps
FIL: Yes
Me: How did you get interested in that?
FIL: Well, I wanted to put it on my resume
Me: Uhuh (silence, as he falls off my radar)
I don't think Kennedy would be impressed

There's nothing wrong with these guys. They're perfect.... for someone else, someone far different than me. I've learned a lot from these experiences. I'm, and pardon me for saying so, am a good date. I've also learned that silence = kinneret-no-happy. And now, I've got nothing to say.