Birthday a Month away

When Liat told me she was sending me something in the mail, I was nervous. This is Liat of http://www.thecuntshop.com/. I asked that whatever she sent would be wrapped in plain paper packaging. Despite my rudeness, she went ahead and sent me a very sweet small envelope (too small for a vagina pillow). I was shocked to find inside pictures from EIE, my high school in Israel experience. I'm transported back to my 17th birthday, my incredibly short stint in the Israeli army, the lake Kinneret party boat, the halls of Beit Shmuel, the kibbutz and hikes. The people.

Facing my 23rd birthday, I'm wishing I was 17 again.

Back then, when I pictured being 23, I probably saw myself living in Israel, married with at least one kid, working on a date-palm kibbutz or running a co-op school. Something ridiculous like that. I didn't imagine I would have graduated from OSU and moved on to TC for my masters. Maybe I'd be impressed with myself for finding a "peace ed" department. I would definitely be excited about all the travelling I've done in the past 6 years. I would be upset that I haven't kept up those EIE relationships. 6 years! I say that and even with everything I just wrote I wonder what I've been doing with myself.

And where do I see myself in 6 years (29)? Living in Israel (half the year), married, with at least 3 kids, definitely not working on a kibbutz but perhaps in a peace school. Something ridiculous like that. Will I sit back at 29 and feel like I do now? God birthdays are depressing.